10 Things: Team Canada in 10 Easy Steps

We all know what Mike Green will be doing while he’s NOT at the Olympics, but due to recent events, I’ve been led to believe he is determined to make the roster, so here’s Mike Green’s 10 Easy Steps to Making Team Canada.

1. Choose a defenseman.

2. Change to look like said defenseman.

3. Brush up on defensive skills.

4. Learn how to have a proper bromance (see Duncan Keith/Brent Seabrook)

5. Stitch own Team Canada jersey.

6. Learn about the lives of said defenseman’s teammates who are also on Team Canada.

7. Find Gary the Bear a disguise.

8. Find a replacement.

9. Make the switch.

10. Pwn at the 2010 Winter Olympics!

Ohhhh Brooks, You Shake Me All Night Long

If you don’t know what Puck Daddy’s “Puck Tracks” is, it’s a podcast that basically consists of hockey players talking about music. Episode 2 features Brooks Laich.

Apparently, Brooks likes (haha) when band’s “hum a rhythm at the start of the song, where they go ‘ohhh, ohhh, ohhh…’” And while I do enjoy Brooksy demonstrating the ‘hummed rhythm’, I do not commend him on his example, 30 Seconds to Mars. Honestly, if I wanted to listen to an old man (okay, Jared Leto’s only 38…but close enough) ‘hum a rhythm’, I’d pay more attention in band. I do not like 30 Seconds to Mars, and while I do believe I may have a song on my iPod, Brooksy does not earn himself some brownie points for that one.

What does earn Brooks some major points is his second example: AC/DC’s “You Shook Me All Night Long” – a classic. And while I could play on the innuendos, I will simply say that I applaud his choice and, of course, am grateful for Brooksy putting the picture in my mind of him playing drums in the basement pretending he’s in AC/DC.

It’s a short podcast, about five minutes, and is worth listening to, even if you Laich’s adorableness.

A Fire-Breathing Monster is Coming to Washington

For those who are completely out of the loop, it was announced today that the Capitals haved traded Milan Jurcina and Chris Clark for Jason Chimera of the Columbus Blue Jackets. To say I am unhappy about this would be an understatement.

I was in the car with my sister and Meghan when I read the news on Twitter. At first, I didn’t believe it, but as more and more confirmations came in, it was impossible not to. It’s heartbreaking. While I do not like Chris Clark and have never been silent about it, I love Juice; he’s easily one of my favourite Caps. He is also one of Washington’s better defensemen. I do not understand why GMGM chose, out of all of the defensemen, Juice to trade. Losing Morrisonn or, especially, Poti makes a lot more sense to me. I also do not understand how Chimera’s arrival will be beneficial for the team. We need defensemen! Not more forwards!

Since Washington is losing their captain, a lot of buzz has been going around about who will wear the ‘C’ next. Personally, I believe either Brooksy or Knuble should be given the honor. Brooksy is a good leader and really devoted to the team and Knuble brings experience. A lot of people also think Ovechkin should be given the oppertunity to become captain, but honestly, I think star players should stay focused on the game.  It would become such a media frenzy, taking focus off game.

Corey Masisak of the Washington Times posted an article about Brooks’ response to Clark’s trade and it is truly heartbreaking:

 ’I sat beside that guy in the locker room for five years and now he’s gone,’ ” Laich said. “I’m sad to see him go. A terrific man and a great hockey player — he did so much more for this club even when he was injured than what he got credit for and what people saw.”

At this point, I am taking the acquisition of Chimera as an omen. After all, he shares a name with fire-breathing monster:

GMGM sure as hell better know what he’s doing.

- Anna

Post-Game Wrap Up and Other Bits and Pieces

Last night, the Capitals beat the Devils 4-1, with the goals credited to Ovechkin, Bradley, Backstrom, and Green. Poti did not play last night due to an injury, not that I’m complaining, and Pothier was still out as well. Neuvirth was in goal and earned himself his third straight win in goal. The win put them back up on top of the league by one point, with the Devils, Blackhawks, Penguins, and Sharks tied at 53. The Capitals are now on a three game winning streak, one that will hopefully last for a few more games. Tomorrow, the Capitals play the Hurricanes at Verizon before setting out on the road against the Sharks and the Kings.

In my opinion, Nicklas earned himself the title of Weagle scout, for the second time in row. He had two assists in last night’s game as well as a beautiful goal in the second period. It was his ninth goal of December. He has racked up a total of eleven goals and eleven assists in his last thirteen games. Nicklas was also the first star of last night’s game, followed by Ovechkin and Steckel.

In non-Capitals news, the Hershey Bears won their game last night against the Syracuse Crunch. This, too, was a 4-1 win, with Wilson and Bouchard scoring once and Perreault scoring twice. Holtby was in goal, making 33 saves and earning himself the first star of the game. Also, Boyd Gordon is up in Hershey for conditioning before returning to Washington. He has been out since October with a back injury. He was attributed with the assist on Wilson’s goal. This was Hershey’s fifth straight win.

In other news, Semin signed a one-year, six million extension with the Washington Capitals. Much speculation has been racing through blogs and on Twitter about the one-year deal because, with a player like Semin, it is unusual to not lock up a mutliple year deal. Dmitry Chesnokov over at Puck Daddy has an article about the extension, accompanied by an interview with both Semin and his agent.

The Capitals may be putting their focus on Backstrom, which, considering how he’s been playing lately, may be a wise thing to do.

Speaking of Nicklas, he’s made Sweden’s Olympic roster! The rest of the roster is no surprise, with players such as Holmström, Lindstrom, Lundqvist, Zetterberg, Forsberg, the Sedin twins, Kronwell, etc. The full roster as well as an analysis can be found at Puck Daddy.

Also, the Russia’s roster was announced on Christmas and, like Sweden, the expected players have made it, including Ovechkin, Semin, and Varlamov as well as former Capitals Fedorov and Kozlov. The full roster as well as an analysis can be found at Puck Daddy.

In much more exciting news, Meghan returns tonight and we’re both heading to Kettler tomorrow for the morning skate! It will be an interesting experience, considering my sister is coming along, my sister who hates all sports, especially hockey because I talk about it so much. This will be my first concrete attempt to get her into hockey, though I doubt it’ll work.

Also, on Tuesday, Meghan and I are heading down to Norfolk to watch the Bears (hopefully) kick the Admirals’ asses! This, also, will be attended with my older sister =] We have fourth row seats, so expect good pictures from both of us.

- Anna

Dear Hockey Merchandisers, You’re Weird. Love, Anna

My appearence on the blog has been, well, spotty. All I can say is “Thank God THC has Meghan”. Seriously.

In other news, Christmas is swiftly approaching and my parents have been bugging me about finally getting together a Christmas list. After my dad telling me to “shut up” and that “one game is enough” when I asked for Caps’ tickets, I had to resort to rifling through Ebay and the NHL Shop (*shudders*) to find some things. Of course, this proved to be more scarring than helpful. Below are some of my precious finds:

A picture of the Verizon Center. Oh boy! Who would spend $8.50 on this?

Anyone interested in a guitar pin with the old logo?

Oh boy! An Ovie switchplate!

Washington Capitals marbles? Who thinks of these things?

For some reason, you can buy a card with pieces of Ovie’s, Kovalchuk’s, and Datsuk’s jerseys. This reminds me of when people would steal Beatles’ bedsheets, cut them into squares, and sell them for a dollar. It’s creepy.

This find just makes me giggle. Ovie looks like he’s posing for his senior picture.

I think this is just absolutely adorable(!!!):

And this is just creepy. Why on EARTH would you buy this? It’s like a creepy frame-thing for an…ultrasound?

A Washington Capitals’ Tiffany lamp for only $500!

A Caps motorcyle toy-thing? Okayyyyy.

Now, I don’t find this strange. I would wear Caps pajama pants, but definitely not for $40!

So, what have we learned from this? A. There’s some weird merchandise for the Washington Capitals out there. B. NHL Shop is overpriced. If you have any strange merch finds, be sure to let us know.

- Anna

Postscript: If you own any of these things, than I am sorry for making fun of you… sort of.

Calling All Hockey Fans!

This poll is now closed; thanks for all the wondeful feed back we got! -Meghan

Meghan and I are working on a project for our AP Human Geography class. The project requires us to analyze a subculture in society. So, of course, the ‘Chronicles girls decided to choose NHL fans. While we fit in this subculture (obviously), we need more opinions than just ours. To aid us on our project, we thought it would be a good idea to conduct a survey on THC! We’d really appreciate it if you would spend a few minutes and answer the following questions (there’s only 13!) and email it to us at thehockeychronicles@hotmail.com ASAP. The project is due on the 30th, so the sooner, the better.

Name (just for reference; it doesn’t need to be your full name):

01. What are some technical terms you use in relation to hockey? (i.e. icing)

02. What sort of clothing do you wear to support your team? What do you wear to games?

03. What kind of hockey paraphernalia/memorabilia do you own?

04. What expectations do you have of your team? What expectations do you have of the fans?

05. What foods do you associate with hockey?

06. How do you believe NHL fans (of the same team or other teams) behave toward one another?

07. Are some fans more “powerful” than others?

08. How can one earn approval/disapproval in the NHL fan community?

09. What are think fans should NOT do at a hockey game? Any taboos?

10. What is your favourite team? Do you live in the same area as the team?

11. What is a rite of passage as a hockey fan? First game? First jersey?

12. What do you think you need to have to be considered a hockey fan?

13. Why do you like hockey?

Thanks again! Again, our email is thehockeychronicles@hotmail.com. Please spread the word about this survey so we may get as many responses as possible!

- Anna

A Sign For What’s to Come (Hopefully)

Dear Hockey Gods,

I’m not sure what I did, but thank you. Capitals win 7-4. And without Ovechkin.

- Anna

Weird and Wacky Search Terms Part Trois!

Weird and Wacky Search Terms in backkkk! So, what search terms have people been using to find THC lately? Wellllll…

Why is Brooks Laich called Iron Man?

Honestly, I have no idea. It came up at CapsCon and can be seen in this video:

But I honestly have no idea. Is it because his Scarlet Caps is absolutely ridiculous and somehow resembles Iron Man?

Your guess is as good as mine.

Dave Steckel and wife / David Steckel wife picture

This search came up six times yesterday. Six. Times. Her name is Didi and they met at Ohio State. And that is all I know. It’s all I need to know. Stop being creepers.

Chris Bourque Shirtless

Yah, I don’t know. I’m sure a picture exists somewhere out there. All I got was pictures of Johnny Knoxville and Vincent Lecavalier. Have we even talked about Bourque?

Sidney Crosby yellow crocs

Ah! Still?! Give it a rest! The mystery has already been solved.

Yousuckistan

This is a fictional place Meghan and I created five months ago during the playoffs. Yousuckistan is an island (or something) off of Playoff Vacation Land, where Geni, Eric Staal, and Greener all disappeared to. We’ve only used it once, though apparently, it’s a category. Huh. Also, it is the exact opposite of Snazikstan. Whoever searched this sure has one hell of a memory.

Chicago Blackhawks blonde hair

Which Blackhawk? There’s plenty… Kaner? Steeger? Eager? Hjalmarsson? Hossa?

Patrick Sharp dad

I actually know what this is talking about! The Blackhawks had some father/son thingy and there’s pictures! Here’s the one of Sharpie and his dad:

If you’d like the see the rest, head over to the Blackhawks website. There are three days worth of pictures.

lamp peerless bronze

WTF?! I googled it and found these:

Okayyyyyy. And there was two searches of it!

Capitals Snuggie

Unfortunately, this does exist.

Yahhhhhh. If, for some reason, you want to buy this, I found it here.

Keep on wacky searching!

- Anna

I Didn’t Know Brooksy Had a Memoir! And in Movie Form At That!

After taking the SAT today, your Chronicles girls decided it would be a good idea to wander around downtown Fredericksburg, and, as always, shenanigans ensued. We spent most of our time in antique stores, which is always proves fruitful. Today, Meghan hit gold when she found this:

It’s a figure of Daren Puppa from when he was goalie on the Tampa Bay Lightning. It’s a pretty snazzy figure, though Meghan is pretty bitter about being “swindled” into buying it since it was in a box labeled ’50 cents’, but instead, it cost her $2.10. Later on, while looking at the figure, I made a comment about him having a mullet. To my delight, he totally did!

In another antique store, Meghan found this VHS:

Trap on Cougar Mountain! Which is, obviously, Brooks’ memoir. The best part? It’s tagline: “The heartwarming story of a young boy, a cougar, and their fight for survival”. I’m pretty sure my life is complete. Also, the cougar is apparently a boy cougar, named Jason. But hey, Brooksy, I don’t judge.

Now, for some actual hockey related news, Alex Ovechkin is mentioned in the November issue of GQ (the cover makes me uncomfortable) on a list on the 50 Most Powerful People in DC. He comes in at 48. The Ovetjkin Blog has the actual write up of the article. Honestly, I do not recommend buying it, unless, for some reason, you normally buy GQ. A (horrible) picture of the article can be seen here:

Yah, not worth it. And now, back to the game =]

- Anna

Why My Dad Needs a GPS (And a Weather Map)

I’m not sure I’ve ever mentioned this before, but my dad is horrible with directions, not as bad as my sister (she got us lost in the ghettos around Hampton Roads twice in one day, and she LIVES down there), but still really, really bad. What makes it worst is that he refuses to listen to signs, directions, or ME because, y’know, he’s always right. For example, when Meghan and I went to Kettler to go ice skating for my birthday, I wanted to go to Chop’t afterwards, which is normally no more than a twenty minute drive, but it took him TWO HOURS because he didn’t want to listen to the directions I printed out.

Now, I’m sure you’re all wondering ‘Anna, what does this have to do with hockey?’ Well, I’m glad you asked! Since I’m also a devoted Hershey fan, going to a game would be nice, especially since tickets are a lot cheaper than Capitals tickets. The logical place to see the Bears play is, of course, in Hershey, but my dad refuses to drive up there. ‘Anna, it’s in another state; it’s too far away’. So, I looked up the next Hershey @ Admirals game that isn’t on a school night (29 Dec, might I add), and he may be willing to take us to that! Out of curiousity, I used Map Quest to determine exactly how far away my house was from Norfolk and how far from Hershey.

• My house to Norfolk: 2h33 with a total of 144,30 miles
• My house to Hershey: 3h17 with a total of 178.52 miles

It’s an extra 44 minutes, that’s all! And, while I know traffic can be tricky up there, I’ve had worse experiences going down in that direction (it took four hours to get from Newport News to my town once, when it should only take two). When I pointed this out to my dad, guess what his excuse was? ‘There’s snow up there, Anna! There’ll be snow on the drive up!’ Snow? SNOW? Really, dad? You lived in Rochester, New York for fourteen years, and you’re concerned with the snow up in Hershey? *facepalm*

In other news, Kaner and Burish have seemed to make themselves only look more ridiculous lately. First, Kaner announces on the radio (does anyone remember which station? or knows where I can find a soundbite?) that he and Burish saw Miley Cyrus in concert. I never thought I’d actually have something in common with those two boys (except being American and growing up in upstate New York). In my defense, I saw her when I was fifteen, not twenty-one and twenty-six…

Anyway, to add to their stupidity, they do this at the Hawks’ Halloween shindig:

*rolls eyes* Does anyone know what Sharpie is supposed to be?

Lately, it seems as though Kaner and Burish have been hanging out a lot lately. Does this mean Kaner dumped Tazer? And Burish is trying to get over the fact that Sharpie’s engaged? *devilish grin* I think soooooo =]

To stick to the theme of my family, we all know my mom is a creeper when it comes to talking hockey. First, she implied that Meghan and I molested Eakin, Carlson, and Holtby in an elevator, and then, she thought we were devising to personally buy Tazer or Kaner. Thankfully, her latest comment was golden. We were in the car after a trip to Sonic for ice cream and I was making fun of Crosby, like I always do. After comparing his looks to a beaver/duck hybrid and making fun of his ass and specially made pants, my mom told me:

• “Anna, you should be nice to him! He probably doesn’t have any friends!”

It was easily the best thing she has ever said to me.

Also, I finally got around to listening to the hour-long Hockey Diaries, which followed Brooksy and Karl Alzner around for the 08-09 season, and it somehow managed to make me love Brooksy even more than I already do. Impossible, I thought! But, after hearing all the adorable stories from his mother (he sure did cry a lot) and Brooksy bossing Greener around while raking leaves (they’re totally like an old married couple), it happened. Not that a mind. Nope, I don’t mind at all. To listen or download, go here!

On one last note, tonight was Brooksy’s 200th consecutive game with the Capitals XD

- Anna