Say It’s So SAY IT’S SO!

• Via Dmitry Chesnokov, local DC sports journalist and connection to KHL, reports today that Micheal Nylander, AKA the Most Hated Man in DC Sportsdom, is still in negotiations with the KHL! I don’t care if its even “allowed” or not. Several bloggers think that most likely he’ll come to camp and see how that looks and if Bruce still gives him the cold shoulder or not and then decide from there. SOUNDS GOOD TO ME!
• If the KHL takes Nylander off our hands I’m going to have to take the EVIL part of the KHL category and put wonderful.
• The team isn’t planning on punishing Joe Finley which is no biggie.
• I find several blogs obssession with taking pictures of people with Cap’s themed liscenes plates slightly what might you call it?… Oh yeah creepers.  
• If you don’t know who Gerry Dee is one your American, two your life is about to get a little brighter. Watch him interview Gretzky and accuse him of stealing his nickname.
• Looking at the Nike Training website  to see who they had from the NHL for promotion made me think of this video from two summers ago:

• I like the fact that it appears at least two summer ago he still lived with his parents in his old room which is adorable.

HEY! Russia You Already Had Your Turn!

That’s right Russia you already had your turn at world domination! Ask my mother and my third grade teacher who asked my what I wanted to be when I grow up; I already called nexties. So none of this KHL expansion talk, I’m looking at you Putin. None of this pan European hockey league nonsense. Don’t you try to take my Swedes next. Then we are defiantly going to have a problem.

Do you realize what that would do? The epic-ness of Europe/Eurasia is already a bit much individually. If you combined your super-awesomeness together in to one rolled up hockey league the world may just explode. Canadians would cry! Americans would continue to be indifferent! The NHL would be so unable to figure out what to do Bettman’s head might explode, and after we thanked you for that, we would continue to be unable to figure out what to do.

And, don’t even try to say that Russia wouldn’t want control over the league. Who doesn’t want control over a hockey league? I know I fully plan on being the best NHL commissioner ever in about ten years.

What silly nonsense you speak Russia; the only way I could condone such an idea is if you took Nylander/Jose off our hands and that my favorite European players such as Nicki, Semin, Lundy, etc, were tied up in such long term contracts they couldn’t possibly leave me until they were so old and slow and arthritic that I wouldn’t care if they left. The idea of any of those guys pulling a, deep breath here, Fedorov (you may clap), is upsetting beyond comprehension..

So dearest Russia, while I love you and if Obama ever needs an ambassador he can give me a call, I don’t want to hear anymore of this uber-KHL nonsense.

This is a Metaphor so Don’t Freak

I got the news this morning. My favorite hockey player since I was nine has offically (well not entirely the caps have yet to comment but KHL says yes) left us. To go to the KHL for a two year 3.8 million dollars per year contract. So you’re kinda dead to me. Cause I’m not following the KHL and not because I don’t follow foreign leagues because I follow the United Kingdom Elite league and the Bundesleige because I offically kind of think of you as dead. I’ll think about all the awesome things you’ve done but it won’t even cross my mind that you’re still around doing new stuff other places. I think about how you used to be my favorite player (HEY Semin good news you just got bumped up a spot!) before you ‘died’ and how your my favorite ‘dead’ hockey player. Yeah, and thanks this has kind of ruined the song Back in the USSR by the Beetles.

So rest in peace our russian friend we had lots of good times.

AND I’m still confused on how he defected here and he can go back. Like I understand he defected when they were the Soviet Union but I didn’t think countries in general liked it when you defect no matter when it was. Especially when you have skill and they wanted you on your team there. Oh whatever just don’t get shot or tasered or anything okay buddy because if you really died I’d be REALLY upset.

ALSO in this sort of news Brash expects to hit the open market which sets my teeth on edge. No offense but an old bruiser starting to kind of lose the edge isn’t exactly on everyones shopping list. And, I like you Brash and I don’t want to see you get rejected. Well if the Cap’s won’t take you then I hope a nice team does.

SO, I hope this doesn’t start a dominoe effect of DOOM like I thought it might earlier. I also hope the young Russian who just lost both their mentors will be okay. Come on guys your big boys now you can handle it!

I’m Better Now … Sort of

So I got out the good old paper bag and calmed myself down and I want to list all the reasons why Feds should not be a money grubber (even though I get it) and stay here:

1. I think that his experience is vital on such a young team
2. I think that the young Russians on the team losing both of their mentors would end with them self imploding and Semin who we’ve encourage so much to get him out of his shell will just completely regress and revert not to even Russian but to whimpering sounds as his only form of communication.
3. I easily fear/imagine the Caps completely self imploding this summer with trades and signings as I think Feds & Kozzo leaving would just start a domino effect of doom.
4. Notice how I mention self imploding  a lot ?
5. GMGM what have you been thinking lately? What  happened? You were doing so well than the Jose trade came and your talent for picking good players and keeping them all went to hell.
6. So in conclusion this is all somehow Jose’s fault.

So its not a done deal yet but it looks like it might stick so all I ask  of  the Caps this summer is to not completely destroy themselves. And whose this new kid? The mystery man from Wisconsin? He sounds promising and he’s a center which if I recall is what Kozlovs and Feds position are …

P.S. Canes could you please pull your heads out of your butts and win tonight? It would be much obliged when my world is falling to ruins.

Don’t Leave Me!

Dear Feds,

I know its not offically yet so I’m trying so hard not to believe it but you can not not NOT go to the KHL. I’ve adored you forever and when you came to the Caps I thought I’d die of excitement so the thought of you leaving for any other reason then you want to retire kills me KILLS ME! Don’t go to Russia they can not possibly love you as much as I do. Okay okay sure you miss your family and your brother Fedor plays there but well they don’t like you as much as we Cap’s fans do me especially I even believe you when you say you ’married’ that tennis player (suuuuuure). So don’t go Feds DON”T GO!

P.S. Kozzy? Ehhhhhhhh….