Because the Chronicles have amazing connections in Buffalo, and it’s court system (don’t ask), we got our hands on Patrick Kane’s apology letter:
Dear Cabbie Dude,
Like sorry I beat you up that was totally like not cool but man like you know I was like totally wasted and I was like not going to but my cousin was all chug! chug! so like I HAD to chug man you know?
Sorry dude it was sooooo not cool but I got to look awesome for the homies and the chicks 😉 lolz gots to keep my street cred.
So you know judgers said I had to write you a letter to like apologize. Sorry bud I wouldn’t beat on an old dude that’s so not street.
My cuzzie is sorry too but Jimmy don’t talk cause he don’t play hockey. He sooooo not cool as me LMAO
I hope we’re cool man maybe we could like party sometime I know some crazy clubs! XD I need a wing man when I’m in Buffalo cause James is grounded! Bummmmmer.
Best Friends Forever,
I know know I plead August I’m really bored and the Caps aren’t doing much. This will probably be the last Patty Kane beating up cabbie posts I do because it’s so played out and bordering on tacky.